Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
We got so high we made milksteak
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
