thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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