im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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