I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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