if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
