We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
