I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
