i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
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She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
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That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I need to calm my uterus...
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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