I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
lol hangovers are for mortals.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Randomize
