Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize