I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize
