Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
