A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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