So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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