This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Randomize
