im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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