i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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