i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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