I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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