what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
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