if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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