But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
