I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Randomize
