I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
