I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
