i jhust puked up my retainher.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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