can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Randomize
