I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
It's shark week go big or go home
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
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