I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
