Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
