Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
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