I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
