Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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