i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
