she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Less talking, more tequila
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
