I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Every concussion has its silver lining
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
