i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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