Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
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