is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
operation have a gay friend backfired
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
