I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
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