U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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