I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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