i would punch a child for taco bell
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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