Just cropdusted the office
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
