nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
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After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
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some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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