I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
