I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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