and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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