im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
