quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
A Guy Sent A Woman What May Be The Craziest Breakup Text Ever
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
28 Completely Safe For Work Pictures Of Genitals
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.