There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize